A single star shimmers in the glow out my window during evening meditation, perfectly placed by an invisible hand.
I dwell inside, praying and meditating while fellow house-dwellers make distant sounds from their music and TVs, during the quarantine.
I wonder why I never noticed that star before? I have sat here many times, but usually reading with the lights on. Tonight I am practicing abstaining from TV, feeling more and more of my body, in this place and time, at this unprecedented time in history.
COVID 19 spreads quickly and governments react daily with more restrictions, death counts. It doesn’t feel real, in this country, but it is here just as much as anywhere else. I do this meditation for the hope I feel, to contribute something.
I return to my breathing, feeling the blood moving through me so fast, humming, a marvel. The Spirit embodies the breath, or the breath, the body. It moves quickly, imperceptively. To find it you have to slow down, stay with it. The mind finds the star again.
I want to believe the star means something. That it has a message for me.
I feel convicted that I need to stop making more of this than it is. And start noticing things like my breath. Like the invisible hand, the imperceptible.
But I can’t stop noticing the beauty all around me!
I’ve already lost the star in my study of it, talking about it! When I first noticed it, it was an instant aha! Beauty. Appreciation. No content. No analysis. Just the star and me. When I put words to it, it lost its mystery. Its beauty.
I return to the star. And breathe. Can I just sit and be with the star?
I can’t do it!!
In my mal-adjusted, socially addicted, reactive nature, I cannot cope without some kind of interactivity – some kind of interpretation, conversation, with myself, with you, and the ineffable. Maybe this is my reality!
I am a human being. I contemplate such things. Meaning. Starlight. Beauty. Existence. Time. My spiritual practice takes me into the depths. It is never a silence for me, but an ongoing conversation, a gallery! I cannot stop moving – my heart, my feelings, my breath. I want to know more, experience more, express all I see! All I can be!
The star has shifted. It seems to have fallen in the sky outside my window. I am worried that I have “talked” this whole time, and might lose the star! But I haven’t lost the star. Because the star means something to me. And who knows that that star is not contemplating me?!
My love of life includes all of creation as I gaze inwardly and outwardly – to me, they are all connected. My inner vision comes from what I see, and what I cannot see. I am stirred by God’s invisible hand guiding me: Look, see! Here I am, in the mystery of things.
P.S. I couldn’t resist getting a Star Finder app and found my star in the constellation of Aries. Like I child I will never give up hope for humanity or grow tired of learning and discovering!
Living in my mind a lot, as I am in school again, I sometimes wonder and question myself, what I am learning, the past, the present and the future. It is a lot! Anxiety can creep in as I forget who I am, and come home seeking recovery. It is not that the work robs me of something; but in my laser focus on the tasks at hand, on reading other’s thoughts in books and articles, or hearing other’s words, I can get lost.
Coming back to who I am, as I write this, as I marvel at the wonderland that is my life at present, I am amazed at how blessed I am. An evening of laughter with family all around me, a husband and mother who cook a feast for all, time to reflect in quiet as I look at a candle, my books, my writing tools; my children’s plump earthly faces to be kissed and squeezed; the dazzling light of the love I feel…
It is important to remember that life is always blessed, but we are not always aware. We may be pining for days past or looking forward too much, or we might be sunk right in the middle of something that has all of our attention, and mirth is the last thing on our hearts and minds.
Mirth is an interesting word; it is a very old word that to our modern ears might sound like a problem, but it actually means merriment, gladness, laughter. Fun. In the Bible, it was used to describe joy or laughter when the people celebrated; but mirth was also discouraged by the Prophets or in Proverbs when the people needed the wisdom to mourn or mend their ways. (We can have too much merriment!)
I find a life that is blessed has both mourning and mirth; laughter and lament; joy and sorrow. We are meant to bend into what God would have us be. We may not always know why we are laughing, or why we are crying. But to live is to feel. And to be in Christ is the be clothed in both merriments at the Bridegroom’s (Jesus’s) spiritual presence in our hearts, and His physical absence on a planet where we live or witness other’s devastation, loss and toil.
But what do mirth and mourning have to do with realizing a life of being blessed? I no longer need to be happy all of the time, to feel blessed. I no longer want to make light of everything in order to feel OK. I know God sustains me even when things are dry or times are difficult; when life gets in the way. I can sense God’s presence, even as I watch TV (perhaps asking me to turn it off!). I can feel God pulling me out of bed to come and contemplate, to put things in my soul aright.
Life is complicated. God is not. We feel many things, merriment, mirth, happiness, sadness, fear, anxiety, calm and contentment. Our feelings lead us to understand life, to process its many facets. There is beauty even in the ashes of life, in lament. A true poet, a prophet, a lover of God feels greatly, and loves deeply. We can express the entirety of life in many colours. God created everything. God is with us (the meaning of the name Immanuel) in everything. So why not embrace all as a blessing? And feel our way in God.
There are miracles in both mirth and mourning. Embrace your life. Live fully and love God.
How Does God Flow Through my Life? Photo: Joy in the River.
I like to think of God as water. Or electricity. When God is working through us, He flows like water, like a current. Think of Moses striking the rock at the command of God, and the water pouring out to give drink to thousands, or Jesus turning in a crowd because he felt a surge of energy shoot out of him when the bleeding woman touched his robe and instantly received healing.
This is what God can do.
We can try to dam up the water. We can try to capture the electricity or channel it for our own purposes. But we cannot stop the flow of God. It will break through. Like a writer trying to control the words that come to me, I may succeed or fail in delivering the “essence” of the Word, the true Spirit of the message. If I remove myself and let myself go, I may be able to communicate the Spirit of God unimpeded. But this is unlikely. I am still human.
But sometimes, more than my human frailty comes through, the essence of God, the Spirit, the brilliance, like lightning that strikes and surprises, that lights up the night sky and crackles with clarity and power. Or the rush of water when a boulder or block is removed, how the mysterious water molecules come together as one force, moving along in one direction, with gravity pulling it to its rightful destination. This too is the power of God.
As a writer, as a speaker, as a fallible human being, I aim to let go. I cannot eliminate entirely how my mind works, my memories, my heart’s desires and my soul’s knowing. Perhaps God knows this, too. Perhaps God chooses where to strike and when to release the power of water with the right energy, force and words that deliver the sounds only God can make.
How can I tell if it is God or myself? Like any fallible human looking in wonder at the night sky with the first crack of thunder, or standing in awe under a waterfall far beyond its own nature: we just feel it in our blood and bones. We don’t move it, it moves us. It changes us. It transforms us. It delivers us what we most need.
God is that force, that miracle.
We lie in wait for God to strike, to deliver, to speak.
We are waiting.
The Miracle of Wanting Less and Loving More
God has changed me profoundly. I know this because my will is not my own. Although I still make choices, I do things more and more because it is the right thing to do. Either I have grown up, or God has worked a miracle on my soul.
In my old world, I used to call my work transformational. I accredited a lot of the pain and gain to myself, to my “process.” The self-help movement that I espoused brought me through many storms and heart-aches. I looked to myself both as cause and effect in some ways. Though I believed in God, I wasn’t sure if I was good enough for him. I would make strides, make changes, take big leaps, and fall big falls. I was courageous, but courage is not the same as wisdom.
In my new world, I’m walking across a bridge, from the land where I once played and performed on many stages – literally and figuratively, to a new land where God is guiding the way, where I don’t always play a significant role. Still, I feel the best I have ever felt, doing what I love behind the scenes.
I used to get excited by a new “gig,” the praise of a co-worker or boss, an honour at school, or a day off. Now I feel like a secret Santa on commission to make someone feel better. I stop to ask someone how they are, to console someone whose father is dying, to make a new friend, to help with the unpopular tasks of cleaning a kitchen or microwave, to attend a meeting for a social cause.
These little acts of kindness and care bring great rewards. They aren’t external; they’re internal. Truthfully, they’re not about me at all! They come from feeling the love from others, a simple smile or thank you, and sometimes nothing at all. Just a quiet prayer to God that “all is well.”
A quiet ride home contemplating the blessings of that day brings joy to my heart and contentment to my soul that I hadn’t experienced until I first surrendered as I walked across that bridge to my new home.
Joy and laughter come from a heart fulfilled, filled with moments of care and carefree play with children or my dog.
I am camping out in the land of God. He fills every place with his essence; his whispers to be patient; his nudge to smile; to sing, and to send our love into the world.
I didn’t do this myself. I didn’t transform by an act of will or self-knowledge. God changed me and continues to mould me in a way that I can still be who I am, without all the pain and suffering. I am working for a new cause, one that is not my own.
The rewards are higher than any prize. As God works on me, I work with God. We make a great team. He causes me to love; I am one small spark, a twinkle in his eye. I get to light up the dark spaces and bring others along for the ride.
God has worked a miracle in my soul. If he can do it for me, he can do it for you as well.
Have you ever found yourself going through life, everything seems hunky-dory, but you are feeling an urgent desire for change? A desire to know more? To do more? To change everything?!
This could be a call. For example, I was previously working in the business world, commuting every day, for ten years, when I got the urge to change my life and become an actor. Then eight years after that, my spiritual path opened up and I began teaching workshops, yoga and retreats. Now, I’m becoming a minister. Who would have thought it?
In a couple of weeks, I enter a new phase in my journey: entering a Master of Divinity program at the University of Toronto (Emmanuel College). I can hardly believe that I will be at a seminary, like many young men before me (women were not admitted until the mid
–60s). As I studied the pictures on the walls of Emmanuel College, Victoria University in the University of Toronto, I felt a kinship, and also an awareness that this was a privilege, a rarity, not just because I’m a woman, but because few people ever choose this path. And I get to do it while still having a somewhat “normal” life, commuting three days a week, doing homework, reading, writing, dialoguing, communing.
I’m on a mission: Jesus and the angels pushed me to work with people and heal them. Before this decision, I worked as a Spiritual Director / Healer and Direct Channel of the divine. I had my apprehensions, worries, as my spiritual gifts became a part of who I am. I even went to a Jesuit retreat with Catholic sisters and priests, to make sure I was “OK” with all of this. I am. One priest said, “I’ve never met anyone like you.” He validated my gifts are from God and only God decides “Who, when, where and for how long.” That gave me some peace.
So what does that mean? It means I have work to do. The feeling of having a mission isn’t just my imagination or wishful thinking. I have to take it to the limit. Beyond what I’m comfortable with, what makes sense, what I want. And embrace the wild unknown – the spiritual landscape of many “others”: people of different backgrounds, faith traditions, experiences. Not only will I learn a lot from them, but I will also be moved to offer what I have – my gifts, services when the time comes, and the unexpected. As they say, “God had other plans.”
My mission is simple: to heal others through the grace of God, under the direction of Christ/Jesus. It includes
usingmy healing gifts, messages and psalms (and sometimes making a fool of myself for God). I can’t be comfortable. I have to do what is in me to do,and give what God gives me so others can discover their gifts, too.
Yes, I’m on a mission. And only God knows who, where, when and for how long. I’m grateful he’s starting me at Emmanuel.
You may be wondering what your mission is? To discover your own spiritual gifts and mission, see How To Do What You Love.
What is your mission? Please share your comments or ask a question below. Much Love!
God never gives up on you. A Daily Book of Miracles, by Krista Marie Moore. Photo credit: Sheep Grazing on Camino, in Galacia, Spain, Krista Moore 2019
Good Shepherd keep me safe from harm, teach me where to go. Do not tarry too long, but find me and bring me Home.
Imagine a beautiful cottage standing on the Northern shore of a remote place, with waves crashing in the distance, and sheep grazing in the fields along the trail toward the shore.
A gentle boy named David, who is singing and pulling his tunic over his head, picks up his staff to go out for the day to check on his sheep.
All of his sheep are grazing except one. He counts and counts and still there is one missing. He goes down the lane and over the hill to see where the other has gone. He looks back to make sure the other sheep do not follow him or roam. They are busy grazing and do not even look up.
David finds the lost sheep which has cut its leg hopping over a sharp stone. He wraps it up with a torn piece of his tunic cloth and frees the trembling lamb from his predicament. He picks the young wanderer up and carries him back to the others. They all gather around him with busy noses pressing in to welcome back their lost brother, who has returned home.
This little sheep is like us when we wander outside of our natural boundary when we try to do things our own way. One of God’s shepherds, Jesus, comes to find us and bring us home. All we have to do is call and He will hear us and send a search and rescue party out.
Whatever the circumstance, whatever the predicament, He will succeed in His mission to restore us Home. God can bring us back to ourselves, back on the path, restore our hope, our life, our purpose. He can even reverse our mistakes and make things right again. Don’t worry. Just ask God for help with anything. You are never far from his warm embrace.
Do not hesitate to call on God or Jesus for help if you feel lost. Let go of your fears and ask, even if it is a helpless cry in the dark. God will hear you and return you where you need to be.
Daily Miracle Prayer
God, please find me, I am lost. I have wandered too far off the path. I don’t know which way to go. I am so wounded and I cannot walk alone. Lift me up and take me where I need to be. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
Call on me and I will come to you. I will rescue you. I never give up on you. You are my beloved daughter/son. You are never far from Home!
“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me – just as the Father knows me and I know the Father – and I lay down my life for the sheep” (John 10:14-15 NIV)
Free Preview from a book in progress, Krista’s Daily Book of Miracles, this is Day 29 of 365, to be published by Balboa Press, Copyright 2019 Krista Marie Moore. Photo Credit: Krista bathing in the Light of Esposende chapel, Portugal, end of Camino journey 2019.
Daily Miracle Message
The world can be a dark place at times. Darkness can be experienced as addiction, anger, negative emotion, fear, violence, and even evil. But darkness is just an absence of Light. So what is the Light? Light is hope, Light is truth, light is Love, Light is peace, light is goodness, light is healing and the giving of unconditional love. Where does Light come from? Light resides in our hearts, Light is from God/Truth/Spirit/Source.
So why do we have any darkness? We are here to learn, to feel, to choose. We are given free will to make choices, and to discern, and to forgive and to heal, and to grow. We can choose the Light. We can choose to heal the darkness in this world, through our own hearts and minds, in all our relationships, and in our souls.
Everyday stresses can steal our peace and make us tense and vulnerable to attack. Whether we perceive that attack as an inward battle within our own hearts and minds, or an external battle with a person, group or situation.
The truth is, we must be vigilant. Not because we are always in danger, but because we are often not aware. It’s like turning the light on or watching the sun rise. The difference between day and night. There is a time for sleeping, and there is a time for waking. And now is a time to be in the Light.
God sends messengers down from Heaven to help you stay in the Light.
The Light is not here to cause separation, it is here to mend it. Light does not force, it invites. It does not condemn, it creates. To be in the Light, is to be with God, Christ and the angels, and to be more yourself. It is to be a new creation.
Daily Miracle Practice
To be in the Light, just focus your intent. Simply ask or imagine and call it forth. When you are scared, when you are tired, when you are uncertain – call in the Light, however you perceive that: God, Holy Spirit, Supreme Intelligence, Healer, Creator, Comforter, Protector; all of these things are words to describe that Light.
You do not have to deserve it; or pass some course to be in the Light. You were born that way and simply have to believe He is there; ask God for assurance. Do not stress about how, why or what. Just ask, allow and intend. That is all that is required.
Be at peace. Be quiet. Go into the Light. Into prayerful meditation. Pray for the Light to come. And it will be done. Amen.
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, please bring in the Light. I wish to be awake, and to receive your comfort, guidance and protection. Send your angels, surround me in Light, healing, peace and protection. Thank you God, Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
You are surrounded by the Golden Light of God. You do not have to earn it. It is yours for the asking. Think not of lesser things. Stay in the Light of God.
“Love Me As I Am”, Krista’s Daily Book of Miracles, 2019 Krista Marie Moore
The human heart is so fragile. With a single touch, we can melt like butter, and with a careless word we can easily shatter. We can even feel differently from one moment to another. Our hearts can seem frail, and yet are very powerful.
Part of showing up with others is just being yourself. When you’re raw, feel you’ve made a mistake, or have gone through something difficult, it can feel like being peeled from the inside out. It takes courage to show up as you are. And it takes a lot of love to meet someone where they are.
When there is chaos or confusion when you don’t look your best when you feel like crying instead of celebrating, it’s time to get cozy with one or two good friends. To take the masks off and let it all out. Holding that space for someone else can be a challenge, but with love, it feels like a mother nurturing a child. To be in that space being held is even harder if we are not used to it; if we are used to being in charge of the one who helps. To be vulnerable, to not feel on top of things, to not know how we are going to make it, or what is going to happen, can be a very scary place. But with Love, anything is possible.
I have been in that space of love for someone else, and I have also been that person being held with the eyes of love. When two or more people gather, there is a great power. It can feel like the world is coming to an end, and at the same time, like it’s just beginning. Our vulnerability makes us stronger. Our tears can heal us if we let them. Our friends can be there for us if we are willing to be seen in a state of uncertainty or need.
God is like that too. We may think “Oh, I’ve really screwed up this time!” or doubt that He even exists at all. But in those vulnerable moments is when the true generosity of God is known. Through our tears, real tenderness in our hearts is grown. We can begin to feel safe, that we are loveable, and that we will always have His Love.
Daily Miracle Prayer
God, I don’t know where I’m going. I feel so out of control. I feel so vulnerable, so raw. I need you now more than ever. Please show me your Love. Please love me as I am. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
You are beautiful. I hold you in my arms. I will never leave you. Come to me as you are. I love you unconditionally. Be who you are!
Daily Miracle Message
One of the greatest challenges we face at this moment is connecting to Spirit. We can say a prayer, walk in the woods, sit on a beach, contemplate. And we may reach a certain understanding or feeling of peace, which is a connection. But very few go as deeply as they could to reach their own soul and the Source of it. How can we do that?
Meditation has long been the sole way of reaching that unearthly level, until the last hundred years or so. Hypnosis and channeling allow you to go higher without having to sit for hours; and it gives you the tools to release the physical and mental baggage so you can feel that connection more completely.
It is one thing to feel more relaxed, it is another to feel the Love of your soul from God. People in my groups tell me again and again, they have never felt that kind of Love before. I am astonished. How could this be?
Connecting to God can be done through prayer, and deeply coming through the heart and not your head. Often God will touch your spirit and awaken a desire for him. We direct the purpose of our time with God and use prayer to help us focus our minds and release ourselves into God’s hands. We ask for protection, and we learn to let go of the conscious mind, so we can experience God’s true blessings of the Spirit within our own soul, heart, body and mind.
In my experience, the holy angels are the messengers and helpers of God who relay messages to direct our steps. We can also communicate directly to Christ who lives in us, and changes us from the inside out. Many can feel his love and presence.
Ask God and Jesus into your life. Connect with God directly if you feel drawn to him. The Spirit of God will come upon you and light up your life!
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, please help me to learn how to let go of my busy mind, problems and body and feel the Light. May Jesus and the angels help me ascend higher and higher to a place of peace and Love.
Daily Miracle Blessing
It is a blessing and a gift to connect to God. You can receive guidance and direction, and be touched by God’s Spirit, like the wings of a dove.
“Starting All Over”, A Daily Book of Miracles, by Krista M. Moore
Daily Miracle Message
Starting all over isn’t easy. No matter what has happened to change your world, know that you will find your way forward.
In my own life, I saw change come in many forms and had to start all over. As a child, we moved a lot. I went from school to school. Growing up in a smaller town, it wasn’t easy to make friends when you are the new kid. Kids pick on you. When you’re an adult and have to change jobs, or go through a divorce, or go back to school later in life, it may feel like you’re starting all over again. In some ways this is good, and in other ways, it can feel overwhelming. Especially if your change involves death. It can seem like the end of the world for a very long time…
One thing I do see now, God has gotten me through everything in my life. I learned so much from each transition. Starting all over in my late 20’s in a brand new city as a single mother, I grew muscles I didn’t know I had; I gained skills of compassion and depth and insight that came with experience and the ability to respond to new environments and demands.
After the devastation of 9/11 and losing two loved ones within a week of each other, I was able to rebuild my world, and turn inward; decide what kind of world I wanted to create. I eventually got out of the corporate job I held for 10 years, and expanded my family, to live my creative dreams while raising my own kids. And I got to travel the world and live on my own terms. From cocoon to butterfly, mother’s womb to a whole new world, I developed the ability to embrace the new and love life again.
I did this through a lot of prayer, reflection, tears, fears, letting go, and finally making choices that felt like the right thing to do. And eventually, those changes, sometimes big, sometimes small, led to the most amazing and fruitful life, a life I could not see until those changes happened to me.
Starting all over was a gift. I didn’t always ask for it, but God gave me the strength to go forward and showed me new possibilities. And now I am so grateful I took the leaps into the dark and found the Light I was truly needing, shining my way into the most beautiful life.
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, please carry me through this change and help me to start all over again. I don’t know how! I feel overwhelmed, scared even. I can’t see what the future holds, but I know you are with me. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
I am with you on this journey. What you cannot see, I see. What you do not know, I know. Take a walk with me. I will show you the way forward in my Light.