A single star shimmers in the glow out my window during evening meditation, perfectly placed by an invisible hand.
I dwell inside, praying and meditating while fellow house-dwellers make distant sounds from their music and TVs, during the quarantine.
I wonder why I never noticed that star before? I have sat here many times, but usually reading with the lights on. Tonight I am practicing abstaining from TV, feeling more and more of my body, in this place and time, at this unprecedented time in history.
COVID 19 spreads quickly and governments react daily with more restrictions, death counts. It doesn’t feel real, in this country, but it is here just as much as anywhere else. I do this meditation for the hope I feel, to contribute something.
I return to my breathing, feeling the blood moving through me so fast, humming, a marvel. The Spirit embodies the breath, or the breath, the body. It moves quickly, imperceptively. To find it you have to slow down, stay with it. The mind finds the star again.
I want to believe the star means something. That it has a message for me.
I feel convicted that I need to stop making more of this than it is. And start noticing things like my breath. Like the invisible hand, the imperceptible.
But I can’t stop noticing the beauty all around me!
I’ve already lost the star in my study of it, talking about it! When I first noticed it, it was an instant aha! Beauty. Appreciation. No content. No analysis. Just the star and me. When I put words to it, it lost its mystery. Its beauty.
I return to the star. And breathe. Can I just sit and be with the star?
I can’t do it!!
In my mal-adjusted, socially addicted, reactive nature, I cannot cope without some kind of interactivity – some kind of interpretation, conversation, with myself, with you, and the ineffable. Maybe this is my reality!
I am a human being. I contemplate such things. Meaning. Starlight. Beauty. Existence. Time. My spiritual practice takes me into the depths. It is never a silence for me, but an ongoing conversation, a gallery! I cannot stop moving – my heart, my feelings, my breath. I want to know more, experience more, express all I see! All I can be!
The star has shifted. It seems to have fallen in the sky outside my window. I am worried that I have “talked” this whole time, and might lose the star! But I haven’t lost the star. Because the star means something to me. And who knows that that star is not contemplating me?!
My love of life includes all of creation as I gaze inwardly and outwardly – to me, they are all connected. My inner vision comes from what I see, and what I cannot see. I am stirred by God’s invisible hand guiding me: Look, see! Here I am, in the mystery of things.
P.S. I couldn’t resist getting a Star Finder app and found my star in the constellation of Aries. Like I child I will never give up hope for humanity or grow tired of learning and discovering!
How Does God Flow Through my Life? Photo: Joy in the River.
I like to think of God as water. Or electricity. When God is working through us, He flows like water, like a current. Think of Moses striking the rock at the command of God, and the water pouring out to give drink to thousands, or Jesus turning in a crowd because he felt a surge of energy shoot out of him when the bleeding woman touched his robe and instantly received healing.
This is what God can do.
We can try to dam up the water. We can try to capture the electricity or channel it for our own purposes. But we cannot stop the flow of God. It will break through. Like a writer trying to control the words that come to me, I may succeed or fail in delivering the “essence” of the Word, the true Spirit of the message. If I remove myself and let myself go, I may be able to communicate the Spirit of God unimpeded. But this is unlikely. I am still human.
But sometimes, more than my human frailty comes through, the essence of God, the Spirit, the brilliance, like lightning that strikes and surprises, that lights up the night sky and crackles with clarity and power. Or the rush of water when a boulder or block is removed, how the mysterious water molecules come together as one force, moving along in one direction, with gravity pulling it to its rightful destination. This too is the power of God.
As a writer, as a speaker, as a fallible human being, I aim to let go. I cannot eliminate entirely how my mind works, my memories, my heart’s desires and my soul’s knowing. Perhaps God knows this, too. Perhaps God chooses where to strike and when to release the power of water with the right energy, force and words that deliver the sounds only God can make.
How can I tell if it is God or myself? Like any fallible human looking in wonder at the night sky with the first crack of thunder, or standing in awe under a waterfall far beyond its own nature: we just feel it in our blood and bones. We don’t move it, it moves us. It changes us. It transforms us. It delivers us what we most need.
God is that force, that miracle.
We lie in wait for God to strike, to deliver, to speak.
We are waiting.
While I was lamenting, God answered my prayer.
I am burning to recite you, repeat you, praise you. I am eager to learn from you, see you, feel you, and share you. Come to me, oh Lord, the one true One, the One of All. No one is like you, no other voice, though you shatter our illusions endlessly with your riddles. Barricades block your knowledge because people are talking, arguing about who you are – no, what you are, or what you said or did not say, so long ago. But what do you say now? And with whom do you walk? Who is walking with you now? Is anybody listening anymore?
You must be a lonely God, for the world is in confusion, as it always has been. But so much worse from our perspective, because we see the history and the present, and we seem to think we can tell the future, too! Deliver us, oh Lord, from our fantasies of what we think is best, what we think we know, and what we are afraid of. Let us know what you see, what you know, what you will allow, and what you will not. What are the boundaries of your Love, Lord, your patience?
It must be cold where you are, so far from the light of the world that you left here. This distant hum of your presence seems like an echo from another time and place – we keep reminiscing, dreaming even, repeating, but we don’t know anymore. We have lost connection. We are searching in the wrong places. We are repeating phrases. We don’t know how to call you. To listen. To be silent.
But we are still asking. At least I am. Maybe I am a lonely prophet. A lonely teacher. A remote speaker. I have no phrases, I don’t know any that I could recite. Except for the Lord’s Prayer. I only converse with you day and night. I hear only myself at times, and feel your silent presence, your smile, your humour, your patience, and your anger. Only you are justified, I am not. My passion is selfish; it sees no winners. Your anger knows the truth, and likes it. It does not tolerate mass hysteria, ignorance, lust, games, politics. What is your politics except for forgiveness? And justice? Our world knows no truth, that is yours. We think we know, but we do not.
Now I am speaking again. I must be silent.
Now I am writing, I must be waiting.
Surely you will break open, and create a deluge, not of suffering but of sense. Of recompense. Of presence. Your voice will be heard. Justice will be given. Light will come again. And again. And again. World without end.
Ah, phrases. They are beautiful, comforting, they remind me of you. They lull me to sleep when I am stirring and restless. They awaken me when I am dull and fruitless. Your mind gives me light to live by, a friend to my soul. I am never alone in your presence. And I am never not in your presence. You are about me and knocking on my door. You reside in my heart, a soft cupboard where I keep precious ingredients that will not spoil. I access you regularly. You are salt and green oil. My roof is your head under which I lay down. I cast off all cares in your smell. Your incense burns brightly in my soul. It never goes out – the wick does not bend, the smoke fills me with delight. I skip when I should be shrinking in fear; I feel your weight upon my hand, for you are beside me. My steps echo your thoughts, and the branches spill out your seed everywhere. There is nothing I cannot glimpse your majesty. My breath touches the tip of the garden and falls back to the ocean, it swells to the sky and dips down like a sea bird. I am ocean. You are sky. We blend well together. One day I will rise to meet you, lay like an unending cloud, or dissipate and melt before the sea-born sky. Licking away every last pebble from my eye. It has been so long since I have seen you eye to eye. The dark thunder split the sky and caused me to fold into darkness, holding myself hostage in sleeping and wilderness. I walked 10,000 miles, I slept under a rock, and a sea bird lifted the crumbs from my hands and fed me personally.
Elijah was sleeping with me, I was dreaming of him, as I lay there, a traveller like him, frightened by my own darkness and forgetfulness.
Awaken! The boat is ready. Come sailing. Why are you living like a traveller, like an alien? Why are you sleeping under a rock when God gave you the sky? And land creatures to roam on. Your bones are breaking under the thick of your mind. Release them, the prisoners you held captive. Those little minions you gave jobs and won’t let go: I must run, I must take, I must bury, I must fake. Let them go!
I break all the contracts you have made before the end of time. You have not done well for yourselves down there all alone. You really have punished yourselves remarkably. It doesn’t matter what your father’s father’s father did. Come back to me, your true Father. Come back to your Father’s house, ascend the stairs, it has been too long. You have grown old in waiting and forgetfulness. I will place my hand on your shoulder, kiss your cheek and cry, weep. It has been too long. Surely, you have not wanted to be away from me for this long?
Free Preview from a book in progress, Krista’s Daily Book of Miracles, this is Day 29 of 365, to be published by Balboa Press, Copyright 2019 Krista Marie Moore. Photo Credit: Krista bathing in the Light of Esposende chapel, Portugal, end of Camino journey 2019.
Daily Miracle Message
The world can be a dark place at times. Darkness can be experienced as addiction, anger, negative emotion, fear, violence, and even evil. But darkness is just an absence of Light. So what is the Light? Light is hope, Light is truth, light is Love, Light is peace, light is goodness, light is healing and the giving of unconditional love. Where does Light come from? Light resides in our hearts, Light is from God/Truth/Spirit/Source.
So why do we have any darkness? We are here to learn, to feel, to choose. We are given free will to make choices, and to discern, and to forgive and to heal, and to grow. We can choose the Light. We can choose to heal the darkness in this world, through our own hearts and minds, in all our relationships, and in our souls.
Everyday stresses can steal our peace and make us tense and vulnerable to attack. Whether we perceive that attack as an inward battle within our own hearts and minds, or an external battle with a person, group or situation.
The truth is, we must be vigilant. Not because we are always in danger, but because we are often not aware. It’s like turning the light on or watching the sun rise. The difference between day and night. There is a time for sleeping, and there is a time for waking. And now is a time to be in the Light.
God sends messengers down from Heaven to help you stay in the Light.
The Light is not here to cause separation, it is here to mend it. Light does not force, it invites. It does not condemn, it creates. To be in the Light, is to be with God, Christ and the angels, and to be more yourself. It is to be a new creation.
Daily Miracle Practice
To be in the Light, just focus your intent. Simply ask or imagine and call it forth. When you are scared, when you are tired, when you are uncertain – call in the Light, however you perceive that: God, Holy Spirit, Supreme Intelligence, Healer, Creator, Comforter, Protector; all of these things are words to describe that Light.
You do not have to deserve it; or pass some course to be in the Light. You were born that way and simply have to believe He is there; ask God for assurance. Do not stress about how, why or what. Just ask, allow and intend. That is all that is required.
Be at peace. Be quiet. Go into the Light. Into prayerful meditation. Pray for the Light to come. And it will be done. Amen.
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, please bring in the Light. I wish to be awake, and to receive your comfort, guidance and protection. Send your angels, surround me in Light, healing, peace and protection. Thank you God, Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
You are surrounded by the Golden Light of God. You do not have to earn it. It is yours for the asking. Think not of lesser things. Stay in the Light of God.
Daily Miracle Message
One of the greatest challenges we face at this moment is connecting to Spirit. We can say a prayer, walk in the woods, sit on a beach, contemplate. And we may reach a certain understanding or feeling of peace, which is a connection. But very few go as deeply as they could to reach their own soul and the Source of it. How can we do that?
Meditation has long been the sole way of reaching that unearthly level, until the last hundred years or so. Hypnosis and channeling allow you to go higher without having to sit for hours; and it gives you the tools to release the physical and mental baggage so you can feel that connection more completely.
It is one thing to feel more relaxed, it is another to feel the Love of your soul from God. People in my groups tell me again and again, they have never felt that kind of Love before. I am astonished. How could this be?
Connecting to God can be done through prayer, and deeply coming through the heart and not your head. Often God will touch your spirit and awaken a desire for him. We direct the purpose of our time with God and use prayer to help us focus our minds and release ourselves into God’s hands. We ask for protection, and we learn to let go of the conscious mind, so we can experience God’s true blessings of the Spirit within our own soul, heart, body and mind.
In my experience, the holy angels are the messengers and helpers of God who relay messages to direct our steps. We can also communicate directly to Christ who lives in us, and changes us from the inside out. Many can feel his love and presence.
Ask God and Jesus into your life. Connect with God directly if you feel drawn to him. The Spirit of God will come upon you and light up your life!
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, please help me to learn how to let go of my busy mind, problems and body and feel the Light. May Jesus and the angels help me ascend higher and higher to a place of peace and Love.
Daily Miracle Blessing
It is a blessing and a gift to connect to God. You can receive guidance and direction, and be touched by God’s Spirit, like the wings of a dove.
On a recent trip to Peru, to complete my Yoga Teacher Training (YTT) along with Life Cosmic teacher Alexander Petrogiani and crew, I experienced the sacred in space and time. The environment of expansive will, of dependence on careful steps and mercy, revealed that life has a purpose even when we don’t know.
Climbing the mountain of Machu Picchu was less of a challenge for the body and more an invitation for the soul: the sacred envelopment of Mother Nature, married with the obvious causation of an eternal and infinite Creator, God the Father, made me less anxious than I thought I would be.
Noticing the softness of the flowers and bushes hugging the outer edges of a nearly 8000 foot drop, I felt nothing but the miraculous, the awe and wonder of the scenery, with only the sound of my rhythmic and reliable breath and the odd butterfly visiting me.
My feet were first shoed, then naked against the cooler stones that once supported the walk of ancient shamans (some buried near the top), and their disciples who still pilgrimage today. I come with a different perspective, but am not untouched by their history and what the sublime meant to them who were so tied to earth and its authority.
I climb with determination, that I will reach the top, and that I can trust in myself and God to keep me going. My ragged breath heaves in and out of my mouth like a woman in labour. It cannot stop my feet, which seem to spring up the giant steps, floating above cliff ledges that no one of faint or fearful constitution should approach.
I am proud of my friend, a nurse with a rare blood disorder, who is also terrified and out of breath, just steps behind me, with her guide tightly wrapped on her arm. The phrase came to me, a reminder not to get too cocky of my progress as I stop for her, as Jesus said,
“The first shall bee last, and the last shall be first.” (Mathew 20:16)
The view was more wonderful than can be described. We all made it. And then we had to climb back down. That was the tricky part. But, it isn’t about the climb, it’s about being there. Yeah, we know. But you really haven’t been there until you climb.
Thank you God, for giving me a new day!
If you can begin each day by saying, “Thank you, God”, you are not only protecting yourself against negativity, you are setting the tone for an amazing day ahead of you.
Spring into action each morning with a “Praise, God!” “Hallelujah!” or other such song in your heart. Even if you don’t feel like it, it is impossible to hold pessimism and cynicism in a heart that is glad, thankful and under the authority and direction of God.