An excerpt from Krista’s Daily Book of Miracles, a book in progress, Copyright 2019-2020 Krista Marie Moore. Photo Credit: Private. 2019
Many of us walk around in the world wearing a mask over our heart. Maybe we don’t even know we are wearing it. We have grown so used to trying to hold it together, to be strong for others. But there comes a time when we have to let it down and feel our own heart, feel our own soul.
What is really going on? How do I feel right now? What am I forgetting to remember in this moment? What do I feel in my heart right now?
After a trauma, or a particular period of difficulty, we can get used to the pain. We can get used to suffering. We don’t even know we’re doing it, but we begin to hide it, even from ourselves. It is too difficult to look there again, to admit how we feel, when we are coping, just trying to get through.
It may seem on the outside that everything looks OK, but on the inside something doesn’t feel right. You may feel actual pain in your heart area, or it may just be like a pressure, a sadness, or a tension. Whatever you are feeling, go there. Go deep inside and feel the sadness, feel the pain, feel the excitement. Whatever you are feeling. Allow it.
Many of us have been taught to disobey our own heart. We have been taught to obey others: our bosses, our parents, our spouses. We have learned to keep control of our emotions and push them down, as far down as possible, which leads to disease, tension, disability and even accidents. Sometimes life causes us to wake up through something that will catch our attention, make us feel again. It may be highly disagreeable, even more painful than the original feeling, but it gets our attention, and then we have a choice.
Are you going to take this opportunity to heal this pain, or are you going to just push through?
You can’t push yourself forever. At some point, you’re going to need to rest. You’re going to need to feel. Those emotions will come back, they will find you.
Dont’ be afraid of your feelings, of your emotions. They are there to guide you. If you are upset, admit that you are upset. Don’t push it down. Find a way to talk about it. If you are scared, be scared. Don’t pretend you are happy. Happiness will come only when you face your fears and find a way to transform, not pushing them away or denying.
Daily Miracle Practice
Feel your heart. What is inside? What is it saying to you? Is there someone you need to talk to? Are you lonely or sad? Do you need someone to lean on? Do you need a guide?
Let yourself feel. Then ask for what you need.
Our hearts grow bigger and stronger when we listen to their needs.
Go deep inside, and then find the answer. It will come to you.
Daily Miracle Prayer
Dear God, I am afraid of how I feel. I don’t know what to do about it. I feel like I will not be able to handle it. I’m afraid that others will not be able to handle it! Please give me the courage to accept how I feel and do something about it. Help me feel my heart and learn to express it. Let it be my friend and guide. Thank you. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
There is a beautiful soul in you. A beautiful heart that has been wounded with time. Let me hold it in my hands and heal you. Let me help you release those feelings and judgements about yourself, and feel what it feels like to be loved.
From a book in progress, Krista’s Daily Book of Miracles, Day 13 of 365, published as a preview, under Copyright 2019 Krista Marie Moore
The human heart is so fragile. With a single touch we can melt like butter, and with a careless word we can easily shatter. We can even feel differently from one moment to another. Our hearts can seem frail, and yet are very powerful.
Part of showing up with others is just being yourself. When you’re raw, feel you’ve made a mistake, or have gone through something difficult, it can feel like being peeled from the inside out. It takes courage to show up as you are. And it takes a lot of love to meet someone where they are.
When there is chaos or confusion, when you don’t look your best, when you feel like crying instead of celebrating, it’s time to get cozy with one or two good friends. To take the masks off and let it all out. Holding that space for someone else can be a challenge, but with love, it feels like a mother nurturing a child. To be in that space being held is even harder, if we are not used to it; if we are used to being in charge or the one who helps. To be vulnerable, to not feel on top of things, to not know how we are going to make it, or what is going to happen, can be a very scary place. But with Love, anything is possible.
I have been in that space of love for someone else, and I have also been that person being held with the eyes of love. When two or more people gather, there is great power. It can feel like the world is coming to an end, and at the same time, like it’s just beginning. Our vulnerability makes us stronger. Our tears can heal us if we let them. Our friends can be there for us, if we are willing to be seen in a state of uncertainty or need.
God is like that too. We may think “Oh, I’ve really screwed up this time!” or doubt that He even exists at all. But in those vulnerable moments is when the true generosity of God is known. Through our tears, real tenderness in our hearts is grown. We can begin to feel safe, that we are loveable, and that we will always have His Love.
Daily Miracle Prayer
God, I don’t know where I’m going. I feel so out of control. I feel so vulnerable, so raw. I need you now more than ever. Please show me your Love. Please love me as I am. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
There is nothing more beautiful than your smile, than your shining face. Through your tears and laughter I hold you. I will never abandon you. Come to me more. Come as you are.
From A Daily Book of Miracles, work in progress, by Krista M. Moore 2019; Photo Credit: Love & Compassion, by Krista M. Moore, Peru, 2018.
Daily Miracles Message
When we love, we want to love with all our heart. With all our soul. With all our mind. But the world can do just the opposite to us: we soon discover love is not a four letter word, it is a force that moves us upside down. It can take everything we thought was valuable and make it meaningless. It can pull the wool over our eyes and make us love what is not even there. Love can make us victims, and can cause us to betray our selves.
This kind of love is the love we feel in the world. It is not the kind of love that saves us, it is the kind that empties us, shatters us, and leaves us with wounds to heal. We have all suffered love and the loss of it – our hearts like holes, empty, our minds wandering desperate to find it, our heads defending us against it.
But what is love? What is this love that sounds more like an enemy than something to lean on? How can we trust it if it leaves us, deceives us, or is not love at all?
That is the question: What happens when love comes in other form?
This world is full of deceptions and illusions. It takes a lot of skill and discernment to see through it, to learn the difference between God’s Love and what the rest of us feel most of the time.
Relationships on this earth are often misunderstood. They are roles we play, and none of us play the same way. Each one is different. Some are variable and go up and down, separate and come together again. Nothing stays the same.
But God’s Love is real. It does not change. It is simple. It does not go away. It can be counted on. Its form may vary, but its message is the same.
If you do not feel that the love you are sending or receiving brings you greater peace, insight, clarity, joy even, then you must question this love. The source of this love may be the mind and the body, not the soul, not the Spirit.
It is hard to hear this message while we are in the body. We want human love to be true. We want love no matter what the cost. But real love shatters our illusions, it reveals them to us, it blesses us while even causing pain. It does not destroy our hope, it offers it to us, asking us to give up our suffering, our fears, our illusions.
If we choose God’s Love, human love takes a different shape. We may have to compromise, but we never lose the true Love underneath.
To give God our Love means to give God our life; it is to let Him take all our relationships and make them good, or to remove the ones that are not for our Highest Good.
To let go of love and receive God’s Love is a holy cross we have to bear if we are to know true happiness. To give up the world’s version of love is the most painful process, but once we realize that God’s Love comes first without condition, and moves through us, we can relax and know that we are safe. We do not have to choose one form or another. We can remember to love unconditionally as we have been loved.
God’s Love is more than enough. It means I can accept whatever is happening, even if I cannot have what I think I want in this moment. I will still face difficulties, challenges. I will still suffer the consequences of being human. I will sometimes lose, as physical love is always temporary.
At the same time, I know that God’s Love is Higher, it is softer and brighter. It will carry me forward. It will illuminate all suffering and save me from disaster. It will be there when I die, and when I awake in God’s presence.
Whatever form this Love takes in the world to teach me, I accept this Love with all of my heart, soul and imagination. I mourn the death of human love that does not last. I ask only for God’s Love, and to heal my fear of loving imperfectly while I am here.
When love comes in one form or another, I wait. I breathe. I pray. I ask God to help me discern and navigate. I say,
“God, make me a channel of your Love. Make me see. Let me not be helpless, but full of the Love you have for me. Let me be that Love for others, the Love that we all seek.”
Daily Miracle Prayer
Offer us Love, Father, when we have lost our way. This world is filled with illusion and suffering. Even love can cause this, especially love or lack of it. I pray for your peace. To shield me from love of lessor form. Show me your Love, complete and unconditional. Make me a vessel of this Love for the world. Amen.
Daily Miracle Blessing
Be at peace and know that I Am Love.